And the Winner Is...

The Courtney Gains (aka Hans Klopek from the movie "The Burbs") look alike contest:
I've narrowed it down to Kyle Orton and Koy Detmer. Right now I'm leaning towards Koy Detmer. Orton's face doesn't give me the same "I've been eating rats for 5 years" look that Detmer's does. Koy is definitely the creepier of the two (ranks just below Bill Belichick on the closet serial killer scale) and honestly, if you can't eat for at least 15 minutes after viewing his photo then that wraps it up doesn't it? Do we need to wait for Tagliabue to rule on this or can we just go ahead and hand out the hardware?

Can the Colt's be beat?

I thought the Steelers actually played ok on defense. They disguised their blitzes pretty well and James may have had over 100 yards but he wasn't dominant. Unfortunately for the AFC, playing ok defense against the Colts still gets you a 19 point ass kicking. Just like Madden pointed out when Steeler corners bit early on play action passes, you should never worry about a running back when Reggie Wayne and Marvin Harrison are running by you. Yeah the Colts can run the ball fairly well, but if I was an opposing coach I'd still stack the secondary and hope to contain James. It at least makes it a slower game. If the Colts get beat this season or in the playoffs it will be for 3 reasons:

1. The opposing team doesn't turn the ball over. You can't give these guys any extra series on offense.

2. The opposing team causes the Colts to turn the ball over at key times. If you can get Manning feeling antsy, he might force the ball. It hasn't happened much this season but occasionally he just can't help himself. He may say he is happy handing the ball off but every part of him wants to throw the ball downfield. If somehow a limited number of lineman and linebackers can either pressure Manning or stop James then he will be forced to throw into a crowded secondary. The other part of this is getting lucky and causing a fumble or two. Remember when James fumbled near the goal line a couple of years ago against the Patriots? That kind of break will be needed.

3. The opposing team keeps the Colt's under 30 points. You’re not going to win a high scoring game with these guys as the Bengals already have found out. Run the ball effectively and control the clock. And oh yeah, you have to have a couple of scores yourself.

Nobody has done all of these things this season and I believe you have to do all 3 (a perfect game) to beat the Colts. It goes without saying, if Manning is not playing either due to injury or sitting to avoid that possibility , then all bets are off. They become an ordinary team.

NFL Thoughts: Week 12

Rams/Texans

I almost turned this game off at halftime. I couldn't take it anymore. My Rams were playing their usual defense (none) and some bad breaks were going their way (did you see backup QB Jaime Martin's glazed eyes?). I kept the game on and lucky for me it became a Ram classic. Can I say that about a Texan game? Part of me still thinks the Rams can make the playoffs, so in my warped reality even a victory over Houston qualifies as a classic.

--So Fitzpatrick (Harvard guy...I'm not sure how I feel about that) comes in and proceeds to ---make some pretty good throws and some plays with his legs (offensive linemen don't know where the hell he is when he does that..they've never seen it before). Bruce and Holt become his go-to guys and he hit them in stride many times. My favorite receiver Kevin Curtis is not even getting a sniff of a ball...but considering this is a rookie and Curtis is playing slot in this game which makes him the 3rd read on most plays, I'll shut up. Down 10 with less than 30 seconds to go, Bruce catches a 4th down and 6 - 30 yard TD catch that silences the Texan crowd. Meanwhile I'm going nuts and my wife peeks in to give me one of those "you know your a total retard right?" looks. - Now even though Fitzpatrick played out of his mind, my game ball goes to Jeff Wilkins for kicking the perfect onside kick (a rarity) that was recovered by Holt (update: I've now wet my pants and I don't care). You know the ensuing field goal is going to go in and I'm pretty sure even though overtime hasn't been played yet, the Texan fans know they're screwed. In OT Fitzpatrick gets the ball to Curtis (finally) on a short WR screen and Curtis makes a nice move to leave a Texan safety (and jockstrap) as well as the rest of their defense in the dust (remember this was the guy that's not that fast according to offensive genius Neil O'Donnell). Game over. I now give thanks for the hospitality of Houston. My wife comes in, sees me passed out, proceeds to give me mouth to mouth resuscitation...I tell her I'm not in the mood and spaz out again. It's been a long season as a Ram fan and will most likely be longer still, so dammit I deserve this.


-Now on to the rest of the league's slightly less intriguing games.

Seahawks/Giants

Wow. This is a different year for Seattle. Never mind that the Giant's kicker gift-wrapped this sucker for them by missing 2 makeable (that 54 yarder was a bit out of range, so I won't count that one) field goals to win the game. These are the kind of breaks that never used to fall the Seahawks way. Now some are saying this didn't prove much for Seattle because they really should have lost the game. But I say, are you kidding? They have got some of what the Pats had the last couple of years. Some clutch play when it counts and some pretty lucky breaks. Don't knock luck, I can't remember too many championship teams that didn't dip into the charmed well a few times.
-one last note: did you see the replay of Shockey on the sideline doing the "you know it" "you know it" dance as Feely misses one of the game winners, only to realize in mid-dance that something just went horribly wrong. He turns towards the field with that "what the #$*%" look. Kodak moment. Someone needs to get this footage for him as a stocking stuffer.

The Sports Pulse

or

NFL Spam

has a great clip of this you should check out if you haven't seen it.



Bengals/Ravens

I now watch the Bengals because I love to see an explosive offense. How much do these guys remind you of Indy last year(including the defense)? I'm not on the bandwagon but I sure like to trot alongside and watch the fun.


Bears/Bucs

Can the Bears win the NFC in January with their offense? It's a valid question. After what the Bears defense did on Sunday, can Chris Simms sleep at daddy's house tonight? Equally valid.

Saints/Jets

I don't know what I'm more surprised with: the fact that both Brooks and Bollinger had passer ratings over 100 for this game or that I actually watched part of it. It's a toss up.

-Curtis Martin reached 14,000 rushing yards for his career in this game. Though he's never got the pub, he's a hall of famer and the stats will speak for him when it's time.

- New Orleans savior Aaron Brooks on the win: "We're proud of getting a victory...breaking a six-game losing streak is the best feeling this team can have at this point." -- No kidding. This has to be one of the most uninspiring post-game quotes I've ever read.




Patriots/Chiefs

I didn't catch any of this game. Only saw the highlights and was stunned to see Brady overthrowing guys and getting intercepted (4 times!). Bad games for Brady are like eclipses, they happen every so often and you better get a good look while you can.

Chargers/Redskins

Brees and Gates played their worst games of the year and the Skins still can't beat the Chargers. Tomlinson had a little something to do with that. That and the fact that the Redskins suck.

Panthers/Bills

So Carolina was everybody's hot pick a couple of weeks ago for the Superbowl. If the trendy thing in the NFC is going to be tough defense and low scoring games, then stop the bus, I want to get off.

Vikings/Browns

Nothing. I've got nothing.


Titans/49ers

Ditto. Wait...nope..nada.

Packers/Eagles
Favre played badly but so did many other Packers. It's time for Green Bay to face reality. They haven't hung on to any free agents the past few years, they haven't drafted well, and Mike Sherman isn't going to be given football genius status anytime soon. Favre isn't a pro-bowler this year but he's not the reason this team is in the running for Reggie Bush.

Jags/Cardinals

-I've watched the Jag's Garrard before and been impressed with him as a backup. Can he do it again and for more than a couple of games? Leftwich might be out a while so if Garrard falters and the Jags lose any of their creampuff games left (minus Indy of course) then maybe the Chargers can sneak up on them for the Wild Card spot. Thinking about Arizona's game last week with the Rams where Bulger went down, I'm starting to think the Cardinals defensive coordinator is telling his players, "you know what guys, we suck ,so just go out and kill their QB. Why should we be the only ones that don't trust our quarterback?"

Dolphins/Raiders
Frerotte had a passer rating above 90 for this game. Nick and Jessica have broken up. What the hell is happening? Oh wait...Collins still sucks. Whew! I'm not crazy. ---I still don't recognize Ricky Williams on the highlights. He looks as skinny as Tiki Barber. I thought getting off weed was supposed to increase your appetite.

College Football Thoughts for Nov 26th

-LSU, Miami, Notre Dame, & Texas all won but none of them looked great doing it. Still at this time of year I'm not sure any team should feel bad about a win, no matter how ugly. It's tough to make it through the season without some hiccups. Notre Dame's close call though gives a little more ammunition to Oregon supporters like me who think money shouldn't rule the decision on major bowl games.....yes I still believe in Santa Claus, why do you ask?

-Nevada is not a bad team (8-3) but Fresno State's run defense is
as soft as my favorite quilt (I love that thing!). I'm guessing Nevada has similar feelings of affection for Fresno's "D" as they dashed their way through holes the size of Rhode Island (261 rushing yards given up). Suddenly Reggie Bush's near 300 yards against the Bulldogs, while still incredible, isn't as superhuman as it seemed.


-I know that Florida lost some key games this year but they beat
Georgia, Tennessee, and Florida State. Now, none were as good as pre-season hype led us to believe, but they are hated rivals. Doesn't that buy Urban Meyer at least a year before Gator fans torch his house and sell his wife and kids on e-bay?


-Oklahoma and Nebraska fans can also call off the dogs as both teams got badly needed aesthetic victories. Neither was awful this year, but a 6 win regular season just wouldn't have cut it for these former Big 12 powerhouses. Prior to the Callahan experience, wasn't Frank Solich run out of Nebraska for eking out 9 wins? The nerve of that guy!

Turkey & Football

Thanksgiving is without question my favorite holiday. Turkey, mashed potatoes, pie, & 8 hours of football. What's not to love? ---The look on my wife's face after the start of the Broncos game might qualify.

- The Broncos have been getting a lot of love in the press lately. Even though I haven't seen many of their games this year I admit I wondered if today would be a rout. So either the Cowboys are better that I thought, or the Broncos are worse than I thought. Also, If I'm signed by the Broncos tomorrow what are the odds of me running for 100 yards next week? My 40 time is a bit off, but I'm coachable.

- I missed the name of the hyperventilating Falcon coach with the sideburns. Who is he and more importantly is he available to sing at a wedding next week? ---Seriously though, the Falcons have to feel good about dominating the Lions. Dunn was a stud again (116 yards without playing the 4th quarter), Vick was pretty good, and the defense made Garcia and Harrington look like....well...themselves. It was the Lions, so hopefully they didn't pop open the bubbly to go with their turkey. They still have some work to do if they want to make the playoffs.

NFL Thoughts: Week 11

I just want to again say how much I love the technology of Tivo. I can watch four full games in the time it would take to watch one. It's a marriage saver. Some thoughts then on some games I watched and some that I just caught highlights of:

Rams/Cardinals
The Rams were lit up by the Cardinals. Their defense is so bad it's painful to watch. I do think the Rams would have hung with the Cards had Bulger not gone down (again). He was having a nice game and when he got hurt every Ram fan watching as well as every Ram player (including backup QB Jamie Martin) thought to themselves, "oh sh--, we're screwed".
Warner had a good day, which must have felt nice against St. Louis. Don't get used to it Arizona fans. I'll always be a fan of his because of what he did as a Ram but the thumb injuries and and some bad habits have made Kurt into one of the most unreliable starters out there.

- Who's brilliant idea was it to sign former Super Bowl loser Neil O'Donnell (Yes Neil was the loser---the Steelers did not lose that game to the Cowboys) on as color commentary dude ? Nobody did a test run with this guy before he was hired? Unbelievable. As I'm watching the Ram game, I listen to the two broadcasters and think to myself, "who's the guy that sounds like he's as intelligent as Anna Nicole Smith? " When I find out it's O'Donnell, I thought, "oh ok, that makes sense". Absolutely no real analysis of anything. Just observations that my 3 year old could make and some flat out stupid and ignorant commentary. Commenting about Ram wide-out Kevin Curtis (9 receptions, 98 yards) after he made a couple of catches, Neil quipped, "he's not the fastest of guys", then made the point that he was much like former Ram "possession" receiver, Ricky Proehl. He made this point a few times in the game, still telling us that Curtis wasn't very fast but had great hands. If O'Donnell had done any homework for this game or watched any Ram games before this, he would know that Curtis is one of the faster guys on the entire Ram team and one of the fastest wideouts in the league. My memo to Neil: Hey dumb ass, just because you're a slow white guy, that doesn't mean Curtis is too. --If O'Donnell does any Jacksonville Jaguar games in the future, he'll be sure to tell us how Byron Leftwich is not a very good pocket passer but he's one of the better running QBs in the league. Pure stupidity and ignorance really bug me.
ok then. moving on.

Seahawks/49ers
Being a Ram fan, I could make some kind of comment about Seattle almost losing to San Fran. But then I would have to point out that the 49ers played other teams pretty tough as well and in fact beat the Rams. I don't need to be that honest with myself.

Buccaneers/Falcons
I think Vick is playing pretty well but (and I apologize for sounding like a broken record here) the way he holds the ball (away from his body and many times down near his hip)while in the pocket (and sometimes out of it) leads to a lot of fumbles. Sometimes it doesn't hurt them, but against the Bucs it did.

- Carnell Williams seems to have gotten his legs back this week. It will take a lot of stress off Simms if that continues. They've got a brutal schedule left though with home games against Chicago and Atlanta and road games against New England and Carolina. You'd like to think that the two Saints games they have left would be gimmees but New Orleans has been playing Tampa pretty tough the last few years.



Dolphins/Browns
Two things on the Dolphins. 1. Their running backs are pretty decent. 2. Their quarterbacks--not so much. - They were just shut out by the Browns. Pass the Maloxx Nick.

Jaguars/Titans
I really like the Jaguars defense. They make the plays when it really counts. Nice game for Leftwich. He's tough, doesn't make a lot of stupid throws, and plays pretty well in the clutch. The Jags look like a lock for a wild card spot.

Lions/Cowboys
Harrington wasn't at his worst or his best. Same with Bledsoe. I'm glad I didn't watch this thing.

Saints/Patriots
The Pats may have a few scares like this or even a loss or two before the season ends . But as long as Brady stays healthy, they'll be ready to make some noise once the playoffs start.

Raiders/Redskins
Lamont Jordan wanted the ball more. He's getting it (27 carries) but not doing much with it as this game proved (52 yards, 1.9 avg.).
- The Skins bubble is bursting. I think they're done as far as the playoffs go but they could still be a spoiler for someone else's hopes.

Colts/Bengals
I was impressed with the Bengals offense after watching this game. Palmer is looking good but I want to see him have a few more games like this against good teams before I am a total believer. His stats are awesome though. It's not the Bengals fault that their schedule is full of creampuffs. Next year it will be tougher and we'll get a better idea of really how good these guys are.
-the Colts just keep cruising. I never thought I'd endorse anything resembling "Marty" ball but the Colts would have been better off getting a little more conservative at the end of each half. They try to drive with only a minute left and that leads to the interception and score for the Bengals in the first half. They had a two touchdown lead and suddenly it's only a one score game. Then at the end of the game they are again throwing on all 3 downs when it would have been better to at least run on 2nd down and get some time ran off the clock. As well as the Bengals played it shouldn't have been as close as it was.


Jets/Broncos
I wonder if Denver apologized before the game to the Jets for what was about to occur.

-If your car situation at home was like the Jets quarterback situation it would go something like this:
Your (insert favorite kind of car here) that you thought was going to be so great turned out to not be very durable and in fact with all it's engine problems you are going to have to reluctantly junk it. Then your backup car is totaled in a parking lot but your not totally bummed because you were never very excited about driving it anyway. At the salvage yard you see a car that you used to have a few years back. It gave you some good memories and you thought, "what the hell, it still runs and maybe it could get me from work and back." After trying it out again you soon realize that it's breaking down also and really wasn't as good as you remembered. There was a reason it was sitting in the salvage yard.
Your getting a bit desperate now and the little scooter you have in the back of your garage is not going to be too fun in the winter. But what else are you going to do? So you pull it out only to find that it goes about 5 miles per hour, has wobbly steering and can't take the potholes. It's soon out of action as well.
What's left? Well.....Your daughter's bike with training wheels and streamers coming out of the handlebars is going to be awkward and humiliating to ride and you have to hope your fat ass doesn't pop the tires. You use gas money to buy some lottery tickets hoping to hit the big one so you can ride in style again someday. Ladies and Gentlemen: your 2005 NY Jets.

Chiefs/Texans
I'm sure Larry Johnson never wanted to see Priest Holmes injured but I'll bet he's not wasting any time worrying about it. LJ is getting all the carries now and his 211 yards against the Texans solidified his tenure as K.C's number 1 from now on.


Chargers/Bills
Drew Brees is making any management decision that might move him out of San Diego after this season very unpopular with the Charger faithful. It will be interesting to see if he can play as well if Gates isn't back from injury soon. If he plays this way the rest of the way, I say they find a way to keep him, and Rivers is the one packing his bags.



Eagles/Giants
Manning and Barber got back on track. The only question is which questionable team, the Giants or the Cowboys will falter down the stretch? Dallas' schedule looks slightly tougher and the law of averages with Drew Bledsoe may catch up to them. On the other hand I don't think the Giants defense is as good as the Cowboys.
-Stick a fork in the Eagles. They're done.

Steelers/Ravens
I think the Steelers have proved my point that a QB can be the difference between being a good team and being an average team. In case you were wondering, Tommy Maddox makes the Steelers an average team. -I'm surprised Randle El didn't get the nod at halftime. What I'm really surprised with is that Maddox once had his own cereal named after him. I'm pretty sure if kids in Pittsburgh tried this stuff now, they would be saying, "hey mom, these Tommy Gun Flakes suck."

Seeing this cereal box got me thinking though. What other football players have had their own morning snack named after them? A quick look revealed an odd assortment of players who all have something in common: They aren't the superstars of the league (those guys get the cover of Wheaties) but they are players who have or had a loyal following and are known for being tough and/or scrappy. I guess come morning, you don't want to bite into a spoonful of pansy. Anyway, here's a sampling:


- Mike "Alstott's A-Train Express"- seems like a better name for a laxative than a cereal.




-Doug Flutie's "Flutie Flakes". The name is simple and catchy. Keeping them on the spoon is another matter. (They're slippery little buggers).




-Ed McCafferty's honey nut toasted oats called, "Ed's Endzone". Check inside the box, you may have won dinner with John Elway. Call Ed (not John) for details.



-Wayne Chrebet's "Chrebet Crunch". Odd foreshadowing of things to come. And just a note on Chrebet's career if he is done for good---I thought this guy was one of the best recievers to ever play in the city of NY.



Panthers/Bears
I'm trying to decide which is more frightening, Kyle Orton's beard or the Bears' defense. It's the beard, but not by much. The defensive lineman had 8 sacks in this game. That's unreal. Their defense is so good that they are winning games in spite of their offense. Reminds me of the Ravens a few years back. Can the Rams have Lovie Smith back yet?

Packers/Vikings
How many times have we seen that look on Favre's face this year? You know, the one he has at the end of the game and the Pack are going down in flames. Yeah the same one he had against the Vikings as another field goal sails through the uprights and hands Green Bay another heartbreaking loss. He gives that little shake of his head and blank stare of disbelief. It's hard to watch. I'm a sucker like many, who want Favre to do well. I used to hate the Pack when they were winning in the mid 90's. As I watched Favre a little more and began to appreciate him with his humor, enthusiasm for the game, laid back style, and gunslinger mentality, he began to grow on me until I was transformed from a Packer hater into a casual fan. I know the media and many others (including me) give him a free pass when he should be roasted just like other QBs that have bad games or bad seasons. But it's because he's a good guy and people can relate to him more than they can guys like T.O. and Bill Romanowski (jerks). Most people genuinely like Favre and when you get to a Hall of Fame level and are likeable many are going to be hesitant to look for flaws. I'm not saying it's right. I'm just saying it's human nature. His praise to criticism ratio is definitely a bit skewed. You know what? I'm not losing sleep over it.

College Football Thoughts for Nov 19th

First of all I had to work on Saturday and didn't get home until around 8 pm (MST). No college football for me. I missed Rivalry
Saturday! Obviously being tired and pissed, the only logical thing to do was sit down and watch a tivo-ed episode of "Ghost Whisperer" with my wife (don't ask). I totally forgot that USC was playing Fresno St at this same time and it was only by randomly flipping channels that I came upon the last part of the game. After seeing the score and getting an update on Reggie Bush's stats I proceeded to whack myself upside the head with a crowbar. - Holy Dick Cheney, did Bush have himself a game or what?! I'm not a big Trojan fan but I do like to watch exciting players. I think Bush qualifies. 513 total yards. 294 yards rushing.




Other Thoughts:

-USC still has to play a potent offense against UCLA and most likely Texas. They better hope Leinart, Bush, or White come up with their usual magic because that defense has not looked very good at times. - Put your tongue back in your mouth Vince Young. It's not polite to drool.

-I'm somewhat of a Texas Tech fan but even I can admit that I don't think that TD was valid that won it for the Red Raiders against Oklahoma. It sure looked like he was down before he got that ball across the goal line.




-Penn St. has to be the biggest surprise for me this year. They are flat out good and Robinson their QB is a star. I still think Joe Paterno ought to retire though. Why not go out in a blaze of glory? Or at least before we need to get him Hubble telescope lenses for those glasses.




-I think Oregon should be ranked ahead of both Notre Dame and Ohio St. There, I said it. Go Ducks. Any team that wears that color scheme should be given the benefit of the doubt.


-BYU and Utah played a pretty exciting game in the big rivalry matchup for my state. At least that's what I've heard. Deep breath. ok moving on.....Despite the loss, BYU is moving in the right direction. They are bowl eligible, which is step forward after 3 years of losing - The Utes 6 wins are a far cry from last year's undefeated season but they are a young team (QB was only 18) and maybe next year they will win some of the tight ones they couldn't close this year.




-Why does it seem that every Big Ten game is played for some kind of goofy trophy like a bucket, pig, axe, or the fossilized head of Woody Hayes? And do coaches actually use these things as extra motivation? Big Ten Championships are nice. But if you've got yourself a nice piece of pork in the trophy case then you've got something special.

NFL Disappointments and Surprises: Receivers

To continue the theme of the last couple of posts I'll move on to disappointments and surprises among the receiving corps. There are many guys at Wide Receiver that haven’t had the type of season so far that they or their teams have expected. This is a tough position to label because there is so much stuff that relates to the wide-out’s performance that is out of their control. The most obvious being whether or not you have a QB that can get you the ball or a coach that is willing to throw it. And really, all hell could break loose in the next few games for some of these guys and they could suddenly look very productive.


- Randy Moss’s 629 yards aren’t bad but he’s only caught 39 balls. So far, this deal hasn’t been all it was cracked up to be for the Raiders or the Vikings. I’m wondering though, does Moss end meetings with Al Davis with the words, “can you dig it baby”? And even more important, does Al respond with, “you bet your ass I can dig it!” ?

-Some might include Muhsin Muhammed on this list after his breakout year in 04. But really his season hasn’t been that disappointing relative to expectations. Come on, he signed with the Bears! Did anyone really expect him to go to the Pro-Bowl this year? The Bears aren’t a bad team but they are not going to light up anyone through the air. The only thing I wonder is if he convinced himself he was going to change the Bear’s offensive approach by showing up or if he was honest with himself and realized that the only numbers that were important to him were the ones in his bank account? I’m guessing it was the latter. I’m not out to brand him a bad guy. It's just that its a little ridiculous that he would go seemingly for more money when reports are that the Panthers offer and the Bears offer weren’t significantly different. Whatever the amounts, the Bears offered more. --At any rate, I don't think he can make the claim he was leaving to play for a winner. The Panthers were a decent team and he had no idea if the Bears were going to be. --Ok then. I’m done.

- Eric Moulds and Lee Evans both are under 400 yards for the season. Disappointing because both of these guys have great hands and are good receivers. Maybe Losman has it figured out now and the passing game will improve. Maybe my stunning good looks will continue to improve with age. These are things that we just don’t have answers for at this time.

-For various reasons Joe Horn (I’m sorry about Aaron Brooks Joe, I really am), Issac Bruce (injuries) and Michael Clayton (?) have not put up the numbers this year that we were expecting. They plan to personally apologize to fantasy owners worldwide.


- But my pick for most disappointing receiver is a three way Detroit tie. Charles Rogers, Mike Williams, and Roy Williams (although Roy’s last game was a real teaser) were supposed to be a three headed monster this year. Instead they have joined their QB’s in a game of “let’s see how fast we can get Mooch fired”. It’s fun, everyone’s playing, and there’s no assembly required. Be warned though, Matt Millen gets pissed when he doesn’t get to go first. -- None of these guys have over 310 yards receiving and the Detroit press has been all over their asses this season. Figuratively speaking of course. Because otherwise that’s not a pretty picture.



How about pleasant surprises at the Receiver position?

-Although Plaxico Burress has always been seen as talented…and tall.. you have to be a little surprised at his immediate success in NY (48 catches, 706 yards). His numbers already are not too far off his stats for the past couple of years with the Steelers.

-Joey Galloway (51 grabs, 862 yards) has been reborn in Tampa and looks like the guy who put two 1000 yard seasons back to back in 97 & 98. Where’d he go anyway? He’s like the guy in the horror flicks that goes out for a smoke and only comes back after he’s been possessed by a crazed spirit. So who’s possessing Joey now? Anyway, horror flick character, “Chucky” Gruden doesn’t care as long as he keeps it up.


- Dallas’ Terry Glenn is another guy who has found resurgence with a new (and old) coach. He’s got 713 yards and has been a favorite of Bledsoe’s on the deep routes. He just has to keep reminding Drew that he' the guy in the white uniform.

-And to plug a Ram guy here (and an alum of both my alma maters, Snow College and Utah State), I’ll mention St. Louis wide receiver, Kevin Curtis. He got some press that I noticed (yes I'm biased and you can check out a couple of good articles on him here and here ) coming into the season because of his breakout performance in the playoffs last year (where he outplayed both Holt and Bruce against the Seahawks and Falcons), but still he’s not a guy many people have heard of. For a nobody, he’s got an impressive 587 yards on 40 catches.



-And finally although, they were listed in my mid-season report as two of the best receivers of the season so far, I think you have to say they are also the two most surprising receivers of the year. I'm talking of course about Santana Moss of the Redskins and Steve Smith of the Panthers. Their stats are almost identical (Smith has 58 catches & 937 yards while Moss has 51 catches & 935 yards) I don’t think anybody at the beginning of the season had these guys pegged as being 1 & 2 in the receiving stats this late into the season. They’ve been huge for little guys.

NFL Surprises: Running Backs

Ok, following up on my previous post of the most disappointing running backs so far this season I thought I'd throw out a few surprises at tailback.

First, anybody that has followed football for the past few years can't be surprised at what Shawn Alexander, Edgerrin James, Ladainian Tomlinson, and Tiki Barber are doing. Even Clinton Portis, Reuben Droughns, Willis McGahee, and Rudi Johnson's solid but not spectacular seasons are not too surprising because you knew they were going to get the carries.

On the other hand:

- Warrick Dunn may have surprised some with his yardage (896) and yards-per carry average (5.1) this season, but I've liked this guy for a long time and felt he was underrated by many.


- Although you knew the Bears were going to run the ball, Thomas Jones has shown me some moves that I didn't know he had. Before he got hurt he had almost 800 yards and a 4.5 yard-per carry average. I'm wondering what they do next year with Benson ready for more playing time. Do they trade Jones, or try the platoon system like some teams employ? This guy is too good to sit.


-There was some buzz about Larry Johnson before the season began but I am surprised at how he has taken hold of the position for K.C. Even if Holmes doesn't get hurt, I think Johnson gets more carries to end the year. He's not the receiver that Holmes is but he's averaging over 5 yards a carry. Plus, I'm pretty sure if LJ had not gotten sufficient touches this season, he would have put Vermeil's family jewels in a vicegrip and really given him something to cry about.

-I know the Broncos run the ball well with just about anyone in the backfield but I really didn't know which one of their backs would step up this year. I also didn't figure on two guys doing as well as they have. Usually it's one guy on the team that grabs the mantle for the season. Mike Anderson's done it before so I'm not shocked with his solid season (669 yards, 4.5 yard average) but Tatem Bell has shown some serious speed to the outside and a big play ability. With some of the long ones he has busted out, his average rush per carry is 6.3! With his 606 yards rushing he has definitely impressed me. The only question I have is, when he's on the sideline and Shannahan is talking to him does he sit there and think, "damn!, those bug eyes are really freaking me out!" ? Just a thought.


Is it possible to be surprised and disappointed in the same season with a back? That's the case for me with Carnell (Cadillac) Williams of Tampa Bay. I think if he can get healthy we'll see some flashes of that early season brillance. I'm not surprised Cadillac's ex-Auburn teamate Ronnie Brown is doing well. After all he did go # 2 overall in the draft. There must have been a reason for that. Could it have been that he's fast, big, and very coachable. yeah that.



Steven Jackson's success for the Rams has not been surprising to me but the number of times he's been given the ball (729 yards, 155 carries) has. What I mean by this is that I expected Marshall Faulk to get at least of third of the carries in a game. That hasn't happened despite signs that Faulk is looking very fast this year. Faulk's window for padding those rushing stats is closing (32 years old) and I think the team needs his abilities. I'm bitter about this and don't want to talk about it. Let's move on.



-Hands down the biggest surprise for me this year so far at running back has been "Fast" Willie Parker of Pittsburgh. I'm not a big Steeler fan but I'm not even sure they knew who this guy was before the year began. I had never heard of him. He's cooled a bit from his fast start and his playing time has been cut into by Bettis (rightly so) but somebody please tell me they knew he would have 615 yards at this point (4.7 avg.) in the season. I want stocks in whatever your buying.

NFL disappointments: Running Backs

Pardon me for my lists, but I was thinking the other day about a few guys who I had expected to have nice seasons this year and for whatever the reason, haven't come through so far. Conversely, I wondered who have been the biggest surprises?
Now I have limited my list to the guys I follow the most, offensive skill position players (and believe it or not I haven't yet dabbled in fantasy football. so sue me). Sorry, I'm not going to get into defensive players. They are harder to analyze unless you really know what your talking about and again, I am a Ram fan so what the hell do I know about defense?
So anyway, relative to expectations and results who has been this season's biggest disappointments and surprises at the skill positions?

First my take on the biggest disappointment to date at the running back position: I think there are few candidates for this.

- Carolina has played well this season and their dual threat of Foster and Stephen Davis have been adequate, but Foster's been banged up and only carried the ball 75 times for less than 300 yards and Davis is averaging only 3 yards a carry with just under 500 yards. Now Davis does have 12 touchdowns but the only scoring that has really caught my attention was done by the Panther cheerleaders.

- Ahman Green's season has been a downer, complete with a season ending injury and Priest Holmes wasn't even the best back on his own team before he got hurt.

- Or how about the Jet's Curtis Martin who after his 1697 yard performance last year gave hope to the over 31 club. He's 32 years old now and his 3.4 yard per carry average is looking geriatric this year. I'm 33 and it kills me to think that if I was a running back in the NFL (work with me here) my career would essentially be over. It's incredible how 32 and older is seen as ancient for RB's in the NFL. I guess the pounding they take over 10 years in the league really does wear them down. To be fair to Martin, his line sucks.

- Another guy having a down year is Corey Dillon. He also has been a bit gimpy and his 441 yards and 3.5 yards-per carry mirrors the Pats season so far: very average. It's causing Belichik to look more like your friendly neighborhood serial killer every day. Keep up the great work Corey!

- And with the contract he signed Lamont Jordan really should be giving us more than a couple of good games and a 3.8 yard per carry average (after all it was the yard-per carry average last year that got him the contract). He's a big guy, he should carry guys at least 4 yards after he's hit. He's shown signs of coming to life with an increased workload so we'll see how the rest of the season goes.




- But for me, the award goes to your favorite inmate and mine: Jamal Lewis. Congratulations Jamal, you've just won a compilation cd of Joe Theismann's greatest suck-up comments about you. ----Jamal has a paltry 480 yards and and 3 yard per-carry average. What's that you say? The Ravens can't throw the ball and everybody is loading up on the run? Umm....and that's different from other years how? Yeah Lewis missed training camp and had his mind on other things in the offseason (namely how to keep the only other guy bigger than him from making him his beeatch) but what about all that talk of him really getting his head straight and how he realized how important football was to him? A lot of people were saying if he made a run at the single season rushing mark with an impending prison sentence always on his mind then just think what he could do without that burden. Hey it's contract time though right? Got to be careful. Careful you don't run yourself out of the league.
--Here's the thing: I'm not a Raven fan even though I lived in Baltimore for about a year, but I do like Lewis. He was fun to watch when he ran over people and occasionally around guys. I remember thinking a couple of years ago, "how do you stop this guy?" Apparently a few strip searches and jumpsuit wardrobe do the trick.

Coming next: RB surprises

Ouch!

The Knicks scored 72 points, shot 42% last night against the Jazz, and had 23 turnovers. Sounds like a recipe for losing doesn't it? Not when the Jazz shoot 29% from the field and only score 62 points. Kirilenko's out, Boozer is still out (I'm worried about the toughness of this guy) and Utah couldn't buy a bucket last night. Oh boy.

Monday Night Ugly

McNabb looks awful. Even before he threw that very "Bledsoe" like interception he wasn't sharp at all. You have to start to wonder if he should be playing. At what point do you say Mcmahon or Detmer would give you a better shot at winning? Is McNabb at 60% health better than the backups? 50%? If it keeps going this way, we may find out.

-The Cowboys proved the point that you can win a game and lose credibility in the same night.

**update**
-I guess we'll see how Philly's backups do now. It was announced that McNabb won't play next week.

NFL Thoughts: Week 10

Rams/Seahawks
Well, that was definitive wasn't it? The Rams needed this game to save their season. I knew it was going to be a bad day when Bulger threw a perfect 1st quarter pass to Holt who was 10 yards from the goal line---he had beaten two defenders---a sure touchdown---and Holt didn't even see the ball until it bounced on the ground.

-It was ugly defensively for the Rams. Seattle could not be stopped on 3rd down. Hasselbeck made throws at crucial points and Alexander killed them running left all day long. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go break every window in my house.


Packers/Falcons
By order of Sir Vick, I am not allowed to criticize his quarterbacking today. The Pack didn't make a lot of mistakes and they played pretty good defense all day on Vi....I mean they kept certain....um...players contained.

Patriots/Dolphins
Let's see. Patriots need a TD to win with less than 3 minutes to go. I wonder how this one turned out.

Broncos/Raiders
Shannahan vs. Al Davis. One of these days Al is going to send a hit squad to Denver. Either that or he will just show up at Mike's house naked and without his shades on at 3 am. Cardiac arrest doesn't leave a trail.

--Great game again by the Broncos. They just don't make mistakes on offense or defense. Speaking of making mistakes, I was a little nervous for Collins at the end of this game. After all, a lot of those Oakland fans are wearing sharp pointy objects as part of their game attire. Two words for you Kerry. Police Escort.

Vikings/Giants
I'm pretty sure Tom Coughlin turned a shade of Minnesota purple by the end of this thing. Really not a great day for NY. These are the teams you need to bust out the whooping stick on... not have that stick shoved down your own throat and pulled out your rectum.

--I know the Vikes won but it doesn't say much for your team when your only TDs come courtesy of your special teams and defense.

Texans/Colts
I watched Houston wide receiver Andre Johnson today and wondered how much we would be talking about this guy if he was on another team. Maybe the Eagles and Texans can work something out in the offseason involving Owens. The focus in Houston would still be on something negative but at least it wouldn't involve their games.

- Indy looks very efficient. Can they go undefeated? I'm starting to wonder. Tough games ahead. You would think at least one of the contenders they'll play will knock them off.

49ers/Bears
I came away with a couple of questions after this game. First of all, which local junior college loaned their uniforms to the Bears for the day?. Second, after a game of insane wind like this one had, do kickers from both teams go to a pub, get wasted out of their minds, and laugh hysterically until bar patrons slap them silly and yell "pull it together man!"?

-Also, Cedric Benson's injury made me cringe. Good thing Chicago stockpiles running backs. Adrian Peterson really came through for them (120 yards).

Chiefs/Bills
What's up with Trent Green this year? He doesn't look good at all. J.P. Losman outplayed him today and the Bills defense looked really good. I'm pretty sure Vermeil cried after this one.

Redskins/Buccaneers
First Vermeil last week. Now this. Gruden goes for two instead of tying the game up in the final seconds. I love this call. Now maybe if I'm a Buc fan, I'm chewing my fingernails off before the snap, and if it doesn't work I'm buying "Chucky" dolls and burning them in effigy, but come on-- this call took some testicular fortitude.

---Chris Simms played great and can expect papa Phil to drop by the house later to take him out for ice cream.

-A good game by Portis (144 yards) was wasted by the Skins but still, Washington is a lot of fun to watch this year. I used to tune in to games only to see how many times the camera would pan to Daniel Snyder after a bad play. I think he started hiding because he knew I was watching.


Jets/Panthers
On the positive side for the Jets they held Steve Smith to 34 yards receiving. On the negative side, Jets QB Brooks Bollinger completed half his passes to Carolina defenders.


Ravens/Jaguars
Matt Leinart a Raven? Phillip Rivers? It better be somebody else next year because Kyle Boller isn't the answer for Baltimore.

-Matt Jones played like the freak he's supposed to be today. He has made a couple of highlight reel catches this year but this was a career day (117 yards) for him. The Jaguars remaining schedule means this team will have a very nice record by the end of the year. If they can continue to score, then even taking down the Colts might be possible.


Cardinals/Lions
Joey Harrington, 3 TDs, 0 interceptions, 66% completion rate. Breathe. That's it. Take a deep breath. We're all going to get through this together. Remember, he was a first round pick. Ok...now your hyperventilating again...stop. Just stop. He played well today, he really did, and Roy Williams is back, it's going to be just fine. Now all we have to do is figure out whether Joey starts over Jeff Garcia next week. Oh for crying out loud...get an inhaler!


Steelers/Browns
"Sometimes you don't need anybody. Sometimes you need to use everybody." Tommy Maddox really has a way with words. Uh...Tommy, I'm pretty sure you do need somebody to take the snap. The Steelers had to use Batch, Maddox, and even Randle-El at QB due to Batch injuring his hand in the game. --Kinda crazy.

--Watching the success of Randle-El and Hines Ward at wide receiver after being converted from college QBs reminded me of the days when Kordell Stewart was called "Slash". Does anybody remember those games he played at WR for Pittsburgh and absolutely destroyed defensive backs? He could have been a great wide-out. He was adamant about playing QB though. I think his career (or lack of one) helped guys like Randle-El, Ward, and the Jaguars Matt Jones realize that yeah, they could probably play QB in the league (and be pretty average) or they could play a position that would really utilize their skills and allow them to be successful. Kordell had a couple of decent years at QB but I would be willing to bet his rookie card that he would have made a difference at wide receiver.

-Now I'm not saying all athletic QBs need to be converted to different positions. That's the kind of thinking that hopefully doesn't rear its head any more. Now more than ever with the speed in the game of football, an athletic QB can be a huge advantage. I'm just saying that not all guys, athletic or not, are cut out to be Pro QB's (Joey Harrington alert here). The difference is that if you are a great athlete (Matt Jones, Randle El, etc.) you have other options that should be seriously looked at. Ok, I'm now stepping down from the soapbox. Damn thing's too high anyway.

College Football Thoughts: Nov 12th

Look out here come the Bulldogs
-USC looked pretty decent against Cal but they better not look past Fresno St. (8-1) just because they are in the WAC. If they make the mistake of anticipating the UCLA game too early it might just end up being the battle between 1 loss teams in Southern California.


Ugh
-Curse you Alabama. The last hope of really screwing up the BCS (unless something crazy happens with the Longhorns or Trojans) fell when the Crimson Tide did. Can you imagine the literal frothing at the mouth that would have gone on in the SEC conference if Alabama had gone undefeated and not played in the National Championship game (especially with Auburn being burned last year). That is exactly what we needed. A bunch of College Presidents from a power conference like the SEC saying, "screw the BCS" would have really mixed things up.


Whoops
Texas A&M has to be one of the most disappointing teams in America this year. I really though Reggie McNeal was headed for a breakout year and the Aggies were going to give Texas a run this year.


Luck of the Quinn
- I'm reluctantly admitting that Brady Quinn for Notre Dame has been impressive this year. He looks good when he throws. Of course it helps that he has two NFL ready receivers to chuck it to (Stovall & Samardija). These two guys could be twins (except for the minor fact that one's black and one's white with a really bad 80's hairdo) with the way they play and the insane catches that they come down with. If you put a clip together with the top 25 catches in college football this year, these guys might be on a third of them.


Is there a site for IhateSteveSpurrier.com?
-Would somebody please punch Steve Spurrier out. Anybody? Dammit.


Speaking of nice hands
- Sophmore BYU Tight End Johnny Harline will be playing in the NFL someday. He made an incredible catch in the end zone Saturday that made me almost wet my pants. His 52 catches and 734 yards this year are second in the nation for Tight Ends. He catches anything and everything. By the way nice job for BYU coach Bronco Mendenhall who despite fielding a terrible defensive secondary, resurrected a program that had been driven into the ground in less than 3 years by former coach Gary Crowton. The Cougars are bowl eligible and will most likely end the regular season 7-4.

The letdowns
-Most disappointing teams this past week: Texas Tech, Florida, Alabama, & Georgia.

Mid-Season NFL Best: Receivers & Tight Ends

The Best Receivers Of The Year So Far:

1. Steve Smith, 2. Santanna Moss, 3. Chad Johnson, 4. Torry Holt

1. Once again stats rule. Steve Smith has 903 yards, 55 catches, and 9 TDs (all tops in the league). This little guy has burned some serious cornerback trash this year and anytime you have people talking about you as an MVP at the receiver position; you know your season is going well. Plus he's a former Utah Ute, which is nice.

2. It's like revenge of the speedy little people. Moss, another short receiver has 856 yards on 49 grabs, with 5 TDs. He is also one of only 4 receivers (Smith, Owens, & Holt are the others) who average over 100 yards a game.

3. With the stats T.O. has (47 catches, 763 yards, 109 yards per game, & 6 TDs) , he should be in this spot. But anytime you sabotage your own season, career, and quarterback in less than half a season; you can't call that a good year. Instead I'll replace one loudmouth with another one. Chad Johnson has 53 catches and 808 yards with 5 TDs. He won't shut up but at least he trash talks about the other team.

4. Torry Holt. I know this is a biased call but I if you look at his stats, he is having a great year. He has 44 catches for 638 yards, and a 106 yard per game average. And he's missed 2 games! Burress, Glen, Galloway, and Fitzgerald all have a few more yards (Galloway leads by only 93 yards) but Mr. "Big Game" has had a stellar first half. Kevin Curtis has picked up the slack rather nicely while he and Bruce have been out but the Rams need Holt (the best route runner in the league) back.




I still think Marvin Harrison and Randy Moss should be in any discussion of top receivers but statistically they are having down years.



Now since I'm a fan of the air game, my Tight End list is skewed toward those with excellent receiving numbers.

The Best Tight Ends Of The Year So Far:

1. Antonio Gates, 2. Jeremy Shockey, 3. Alge Crumpler, 4. Erron Kinney

1. Gates has 707 yards receiving. That's 7th best in the entire league! He's got 51 catches (4th best) and 6 Touchdowns. He's not a bad blocker either. Hands down the best Tight End in the NFL. You can go ahead and cry now Tony Gonzalez.

2. I'm not a fan, but Shockey has saved Eli's bacon more than a few times. He's got 32 grabs, 530 yards, and 5 TDs.

3. Crumpler might rival Gates if he was on a team that passed the ball well. He's a good blocker and somehow manages to pull Vick's bullet passes down with fingers still attached.

4. Erron Kinney. Amazingly, Tennessee's Kinney has more yards (459) and catches (44) than K.C.'s Gonzalez, Dallas' Whitten, and Baltimore's Heap. I don't know who the hell this guy is or why he spells his name with an E but I'm not surprised he's had a good year. Ever since Norm Chow was at BYU he has tried hard to get the tight end involved in the offense.

Mid-Season Best: Quarterback

The Best Quarterbacks So Far This Season:
First of all, even though he has the best QB rating, I'm not putting Roethlisberger in my top four. Anybody that has only put the ball in the air only 130 times in half a season doesn't deserve to be mentioned as a top QB for the year. A good QB who manages the game well and doesn't make too many mistakes? Yes. Crucial to the Steeler's success and someone who shouldn't be underestimated? Yep. But you got to fling it to be on my pass-happy list (I'm a Ram fan for hell's sake, what do you expect?). Anyway...here's the top four:

1. Carson Palmer, 2. Peyton Manning, 3. Tom Brady, 4. Jake Plummer

1. Palmer and the Bengals haven't beaten anybody of significance yet but his stats don't lie. His completion percentage is 70%. That's insane. Over 2285 passing yards with 18 TDs and 5 interceptions. 106 .3 passer rating. If he can put it together in the playoffs maybe he can live up to the hype his play is creating. Now if Chris Berman could just quit with the Johnny Carson theme music I might actually enjoy Bengal highlights.


2. Manning started off slow but has picked it up the past few games and now has the third best QB rating at 101.2 (coincidently, the same digits as his favorite radio station which plays Kenny Loggins tunes all the time). He's approaching 2000 yards and has 14 TDs, 6 picks. More importantly he's playing smart this year. I don't believe he was only interested in stats the past few years, but I do think he thought the best way to win games was by scoring as fast as he could. He's learned patience this year (it helps when you know your defense isn't going to be scored on like Tara Reid at a B-list party) and maybe he can beat the Pats in the playoffs this year. Maybe.

3. Brady is the only reason this team leads their division. Oh, and the fact that the Jets and Dolphins QB's are so bad that their game film should be destroyed and never discussed again. Ever. Holcomb has been decent for the Bills but Tom Brady has shown me that not only can he play well when the game is on the line, but he can play well when he has to pass most of the time. Dillon has been disappointing and hobbled this year but Brady has compensated as he has completed 63% of his passes for over 2200 yards, 12 TDs and only 4 interceptions. I hate his guts (loved the Indy game) and I hope he turns into Aaron Brooks sometime this season, but let's just say if I was a betting man I would have a man-crush on Tom.

4. I don't believe Jake Plummer is the MVP candidate that some are making him out to be, but he's having a career year with a 60% completion percentage and has a 91.3 QB rating (even he can't believe it). Sure Bledsoe, Brees, and Delhomme all are having good years and have more yards and little better rating than Jake, but they also have thrown really bad interceptions at crucial times this year (leading to defeats). Bledsoe's pick against Seattle still makes me throw up in my mouth. Jake has only 3 interceptions this year while still throwing for over 1600 yards. Now it's a little early to decide whether Plummer is truly a changed man (same with Bledsoe) but he has played extremely well this year.

Mid-Season NFL Best: Running Back

Best Running Back for the season so far:

These 4 guys are all having good years but I would rank them so far this season as:
1. Shawn Alexander, 2. Warrick Dunn, 3. Edgerrin James, 4. LaDainian Tomlinson

This was close for me but I went with Shawn Alexander (may my Ram soul burn in hell) by a hair over Warrick Dunn. Alexander has the most yards (949) and the best average (5.4) despite everyone stacking the box against the Seahawks. Hasselbeck's been no slouch (still bald) this year but Alexander has been their offense and a scoring machine.

Some would ask how I could not put Charger back LaDainian Tomlinson (also a fantasy stud) or Edgerrin James over Warrick Dunn (or for that matter Alexander). Tomlinson (835 yards) only has 15 more yards than Warrick Dunn (820) and only a 4.3 yard per carry average compared to Dunn's 5.1 average. Granted, LT's a monster in the red zone, and he does have 264 yards receiving (much more than Dunn and Alexander)-- but despite the hype around him, he hasn't run the ball quite as effectively as Alexander or Dunn (based mainly on rushing average) and they don't call them RUNNING backs just because it sounds cool. James has good stats and has been crucial for the Colt's this year (906 yards, 4.6 average, 181 rec.yards) but the the danger of a All Pro QB has helped him moreso than the other backs. Bottom line is that Alexander and Dunn so far this year have had to go against defenses waiting for the run and they still are piling up the yards.

Most mis-used running back this year:
Marshall Faulk is averaging over 5 yards a carry but has been given the rock only 27 times! Now I know Steven Jackson is the future in St. Louis but Faulk has looked healthy and quick and should be getting a chance to show that he still has it. The Rams have treated this guy with no class this year. He may have agreed that Jackson should be the starter this year but I'm sure he didn't envision getting less than 4 carries a game. I'm not entirely rational about this because of what he's done in the past but I don't think I 'm out to lunch either in thinking he should be playing a bigger part in their offense.

That's My Boy!

Pete Rose Jr. has been charged with a federal offense of distributing steroids. Proud pappa Pete Sr. says, "I don't think Pete ran a red light or had a speeding ticket. That's the kind of kid he is......I wish people understood how small the mistake he made is."

Is it smaller than the tiny mistake that's keeping you out of the hall of fame Pete?
Dealing illegal drugs? Come on Jr.! That's so little league. If your going to impress pop you need to crank it up a notch. Like pulling a Tonya Harding on Bud Selig's knees. Damn kids! Do you have to do everything for them?

NFL Thoughts: Week 9

Colts/Patriots
I sure hope this game was a sign of the Pats demise. Wishful thinking on my part. Right now the Colts are just better and for once the Patriots didn't have the weather on their side. New England can fans can relax though. The Patriots will cruise through the second half of their schedule. They play the Bills, Dolphins, and Jets each twice; as well as Tampa Bay and New Orleans. I think they will win 6 of those to finish at the very least 10-6. They will probably face the Colt's again in the playoffs (this time in Indy) and then we'll truly see if Manning and co. can throw the monkey off their backs and beat the hell out of him.....ahem....lets move on.

-I liked that Manning took the underneath routes that he's always had against the Patriots (but usually passed up for riskier deep routes) and was patient. Other than the first series bomb that worked, the longer pass plays were successful after the Colts had set the Pats up perfectly. James wasn't great tonight but he was consistent enough to keep New England honest. This game was probably a let-down for many who had anticipated a closer score but for a Patriot hater it was right up my alley. I want no part of Tom Brady in the 4th quarter and a tight game. I'm kinda chicken that way.

- By the way are there two bigger geeks in the league than Peyton Manning and Bill Belichick? I just watched post-game interviews with both and believe me, if these guys are not in sports, there's not a chance in hell they are scoring a date with the ladies. Belichick just creeps you out...almost like a serial killer (seriously, if this was a guy that lived down your street and one day the cops showed up and pulled up a backyard full of bodies, would you be surprised? Would you say, "oh no it couldn't be him, he's not the type"? Didn't think so) ---and Manning's just....well...goofy. How do you explain goofy? You just know it when you see it. If you saw the "inside/out" interview segment of Manning that was played during the game, you know what I mean. There's nothing goofy about the way he plays though (other than his incessant checks and movement at the line of scrimmage), and he is a coach's dream and a receiver's best friend.

Back to Sunday's games:

Chargers/Jets
San Diego seems like they should be one of the better teams in the league. If that's true why can't they start blowing teams out like they did with the Patriots? There is no way the Jets should have been able to make the game that close. If they can avoid "Marty ball" (play not to lose instead of play to win) which seems to plague them in the 4th quarter of games they might actually be dangerous.

-For the Jets it should be obvious by now that Vinny is not saving their season. I think it was a good move to sign him--but only to give depth to the backup position. Bollinger ought to be playing even if he plays horrible. Which he will. But at least he'll play horrible with a bit more scrappiness.

Falcons/Dolphins
I think the Falcons are for real. Pretenders usually lose games like this. I love that Vick is upset that enough people (raised hand here) don't give him enough credit for his passing skills. He's going to need that chip on his shoulder to put together a few more days like the one he had against the Fish. Because unless he does it on a consistent basis he's going to keep hearing the jabs about his throwing skills. Speaking of their passing game, the Falcons tight end, Crumpler, makes some great catches doesn't he? He's a huge target and has soft hands. Just don't tell him his butt is big. He hates that.

-Also I heard one of the tv guys say that Falcon's coach Jim Mora had given up that great pre-game ritual of taking a whiff of the smelling salts with his players. He didn't want to give kids the wrong idea. This got me to thinking. Does Jim pull this ritual out at home before important activities? --- "honey, I'm feeling frisky tonight....where's the smelling salts?"

--What can I say about Miami. I like their team, I really do. Decent defense, some nice options on offense, a coach with a cool name....If only they could trade for Brett Favre....wait T.O. already called "dibs" on that didn't he?

Raiders/Chiefs
I'll join in on the love parade for Vermeil's decision to give the ball to Larry Johnson at the end of the game. I know Schottenheimer, Herm Edwards, and a few other frugal coaches would not have had the guts to make this call.


Lions/Vikings
I turned the channel to this game only once. Joey Harrington was in the process of underthrowing a receiver by 4 yards. The receiver was a only doing a 10 yard route. Nice to see things don't change in Detroit.


-I never thought after last season that Brad Johnson playing QB for the Vikings again would be a good thing. Even had Culpepper not gotten hurt I'm not sure he would have turned his season around. He seems to play well only on even-numbered years.

Seahawks/Cardinals
It doesn't say much for your team when your best player for the season is your kicker. Neil Rackers is 26/26 on field goals. Nice leg. Warner is still auditioning for a part in that little comedy called "washed up and I haven't realized it yet". Mcown should be starting every game from now on so they can evaluate whether they should go after a QB in the draft, trade, or free agency when the season mercifully ends for them.

- The Seahawks are sadly putting my Rams in their rearview mirror with every passing week. Alexander had another big day with 173 yards and he should be getting some MVP love if he and Seattle keep it up. Hasselbeck is avoiding stupid turnovers that have plagued him in the past and their receivers are hanging onto the ball. As Vince Lombardi would say, "what in the hell is going on out here?" I hope they show their old form next week when St. Louis comes to town.



Texans/Jaguars
Fred Taylor's career is a big "what if". I feel bad for the guy. He just can't stay healthy. When he has his legs he's a top-tier running back. - The Jags need a little more consistency. Their defense is good and they play hard but hardly ever look great doing it. Then again the Ravens won a Super Bowl in 2000 with the same formula.

Speaking of the Ravens...
Ravens/Bengals
Baltimore is happy to have Kyle Boller back next week. Cue the confetti. That tells you a lot about their season doesn't it?

Here's something that should make Cincinnati fans feel good about the future for their team. They are beating bad teams. Not all talented teams do this. They have had a decent team the past couple of years, but they lost quite a few games to teams that weren't very good. They are a year away from seriously threatening for the AFC crown but this is a team on the rise.

Giants/49ers
Everyone is harping on the Giants for not looking good against San Fran. Washington looked like Super Bowl champs against the 49ers but looked like chumps against the Giants. What does that tell us? Not much. Let's see how the Giants look against the Eagles, Cowboys, and Seahawks before we pronounce them over-rated.

-Besides, other than getting shalacked against the Eagles and Skins, San Francisco has played teams pretty tough. They aren't laying down like some other teams with their level of talent.



Titans/Browns
Reuben Droughns got into some trouble with the law and then gave some trouble to the Titans (116 yards). Nice game but it's hard to feel good for a guy that just got a DUI. After all, that could be you and your family someday on the other side of the road. He seems like a nice guy though and hopefully won't repeat his mistake. Everyone needs a second chance (sit down T.O. supporters, I said second not 17th).

Bears/Saints
Don't look now but the Bears are running away with their division. And children shield your eyes, Aaron Brooks is in the building.

Steelers/Packers
I thought the Pack would have a chance in this one without Bettis and Roethlisberger playing for Pittsburgh. -- I'm guessing even with a tough season so far, Brett Favre's not home thinking "we would be undefeated if we only had Terrell Owens."

Eagles/Redskins
I think a banged up McNabb is the difference for the Eagles this year. They've been exposed in some other areas but Donovan just doesn't look very healthy or very good.

Panthers/Buccaneers
The Panthers have got some nice headliners in their organization. Steve Smith and his continual dominance at the receiver position ranks just a hair below their cheerleaders who have given new meaning to the phrase, "dirty bathroom". The way the Panthers dominated the Bucs in every part of the game was pretty impressive. When they started 1-2 for the season it seemed all the pre-season hype was a bit overrated. Now it looks like they are headed in the opposite direction of Tampa Bay.

--Where did the Buc's running back Cadillac Williams disappear to? I know he's already had injury problems but either that line isn't opening up holes anymore or he's still hurting. He's got too many moves and too much speed to be bottled up the way he has been. I tell you what though, I know I'm weird this way but I love to see Gruden's mug when he's ticked. I'm not sure which is better comedy; Gruden's "Chucky" face or Bill Cowher's "get near me and you get a logie hocked on you" scowl.

College Football Thoughts: Nov 5

Some quick thoughts on Saturday's college football action:

Conspiracy!
What did BCS officials put in Marcus Vick's gatorade during the VA Tech/Miami game? Very disappointing performance by Vick and the Hokies. I know Miami's defense is good but Tech's offense was flatter than Kiera Knightley.

Yawn
Texas and USC looked awesome again. Bush, Leinart, and Vince Young are the reason these guys are undefeated and should be the top 3 in votes received for the Heisman. That will be a close vote.

Another quarter and we would have had them!
UCLA bummed me out today. I had been hoping for a undefeated showdown between the Bruins and Trojans later this month. The boys from L.A. played with matches one too many times and finally got burned.

The ugly sister
Alabama is undefeated but they're not blowing your socks off are they? (sit down Bama fans, I'm ignoring you) It doesn't matter if they win out, if they continue to perform offensively like they have been the past few weeks, and the Longhorns and Trojans are still undefeated, nobody will have a beef that the Crimson Tide aren't invited to the party (still ignoring you Alabama folks). I will say this though, Alabama ought to have the chance to show what they can do if they run the table. A playoff system? What a novel idea.

Pink slip anyone?
I never thought I'd say this, but I miss Trev Alberts on ESPN. Did this network watch any of Lou Holtz's press conferences when he was a coach? He lives in a world where coaches and officials should not be questioned, criticized, or ever be held accountable. No team should ever be thought of in bad terms. It's not like I have some sick need to hear negative stuff but his rosy view about everything gets annoying. It destroys his credibility. No new insight is ever given by Lou. No real analysis ever comes forth. I now have the mute button ready to fire when the Holtzinator speaks.

....Or Not

Terrell Owens suspended indefinitely? In terms of signing T.O., how many times a day do you think Andy Reid says to himself, "what the hell were we thinking?" Also which team is going to step up and take their dose of T.O. up the wazoo next? You know there is another coach out there with an ego big enough to think he can control him. An experience my secretary had recently reminds me of the Owens situation. She really wanted to avoid getting the flu this year and the Human Resources office was offering free flu shots for employees. She knew that flu shots do some really good things for people. She also knew that these shots had given her problems in the past. She desperately wanted to stay healthy this year. So she took the risk and went and got the flu shot. Well, the result was inevitable. The next day she had a high fever, was running for the john every couple of minutes and basically had the worst case of the flu that she had ever had. She blamed the flu shot but she also blamed herself because she knew that for her, the risk was high. My point is obvious. The Eagles knew what they were getting. Any team in the future that is stupid enough to try this little game of T.O. roulette deserves what they get.

T.O. Apologizes

"It has been brought to my attention that I have offended the organization and my teammates. Therefore, I would like to apologize for any derogatory comments toward them." -Terrell Owens

Concerning my previous post, I think the Eagles and I are on the same wavelength. It's obvious T.O. was invited into the Godfather's office and presented options. I hope Andy Reid had cottonballs in his cheeks.

Terrell Owens: Humanitarian of the Year

In the least surprising sports news item of the NFL season, Terrell Owens has again blasted the Eagles and Donovan McNabb. In an ESPN interview he agreed with some comments made by Michael Irvin that the Eagle's would be better off with Brett Favre at quarterback and probably undefeated. Then he went on to rip the Eagles for not having the class to celebrate his 100th TD with the pomp and fanfare he deserves.

First , I can't put into words how much I hate this guy. I root for bad things to happen to Owens every week. I don't care what it is. Dropped balls and bone-crushing hits that leave his mouth paralyzed forever are a couple that come to mind. For him to repeatedly trash his quarterback and one of the genuinely good guys in the league is not only wrong but downright stupid. I mean this is the guy that will decide if he wants to throw you the ball. And to accuse his own organization of lacking something (class) of which he doesn't have a shred of, is just ridiculous. I'm so tired of athletes trying to make themselves into the victim. I watched Karl Malone do this over and over in Utah. It's boring, childish, and definitely gives us a clue about the insecurities some of these guys have. Andy Reid and the Eagles ought to go all "Godfather" on his ass and leave a horse's head in his bed tonight. Actually, animal rights activists might hunt me down for that statement so maybe other messages could be sent to Terrell in the spirit of the Godfather. A couple of ideas:

1. Make him an offer he can't refuse. Donovan and all his offensive lineman show up at T.O's house to present him with some options. Either he shuts up and plays hard or......ah hell......screw the options, just rip his tongue out and render him speechless for the rest of his life. And yes, I know I'm demented.

2. Tell him he's going to sleep with the fishes. Maybe a threat of a trade to play under Gus Frerotte with the Dolphins would help him shut up. Since the Dolphins are actually a pretty decent team and someday might have a decent QB, this might be too much of a reward for him.

3. Even better, threaten to trade him to the Texans. Actually, don't threaten, just do this. He deserves this. The Texans don't, but I'm all about making T.O. hurt here.

4. Give him the Kiss of Death. Remember in the Godfather II that look Fredo got on his face after Michael kissed him and said, "I know it was you Fredo". Classic "holy crap, I'm screwed" look. This is the look we want for T.O. ---I've figured out how to achieve this. Lure Owens into a secure area of the Eagle's facilities. Lock him, Keyshawn Johnson, and former Eagle receiver Freddie Mitchell (the guy who thanked his hands for being so great....and then was cut) in a room together for at least a month. To recoup some cash, the Eagles could sell footage of this for a reality show.


Did I mention I hate this guy?

A Jazz Fan's Preview

Being a Utah guy I have to say something about the upcoming Jazz basketball season. The last couple of years have been a strange experience as a Jazz fan. When the Stockton and Malone era ended many experts picked the Jazz to finish as the worst team in the NBA for the 2003-04 season. They defied expectations (42-40 record) and just missed the playoffs that year with the help of a rising star named Andrei Kirilenko. The Jazz had plenty of money to throw around last year and they shot their wad on Carlos Boozer (ok so he stabbed the Cavs in the back but it seemed like a good deal for Utah) and Mehmet Okur (a promising scoring center on the bench in Detroit), and gave a nice contract to point guard Carlos Arroyo, who had just trashed the U.S. squad in the Olympics for Puerto Rico and seemed ready for a breakout year. The Jazz were promoting their slogan for the year "I can't wait" and it seemed to represent what many Utah fans were feeling. There was a palpable excitement about the promise and hope of this team. Jazz fans had been hearing for years before Stockton and Malone left that their era was ending. By the time it did, many were feeling some feelings of relief. We would miss the dynamic duo and things were going to be rough in the future until new stars emerged, but at least we could start that process (be careful what you wish for).
That's why the 2003-04 season was so cruel. We had no reason to expect anything that year and then somehow Kirilenko and the Jazz overachieve and are fighting for a playoff spot until the last day of the season.

Then came the 04-05 season. The Jazz win their first 6 games, Kirilenko is scoring and seemingly blocking every shot put up by the opposition. Their was excitement in the air. This team's down time was going to be non-existent!......Um...Earth to Jazz fans....come in Jazz fans..... Yeah. Kirilenko ends up getting hurt and spending half the season in street clothes. Arroyo never plays up to expectations, ends up in Sloan's doghouse and is traded to the Pistons. Boozer also spends significant time hurt and although his stats aren't bad, Jazz fans are more than a little disappointed in his season. Final record 26-56. Ouch. Back to reality.

The end of the season brought the Jazz the highest draft pick (traded up to get the # 3 slot) they had seen in a long while. They needed a point guard and they had Chris Paul and Deron Williams as the two highest rated guys to pick from. As everyone knows they went with Williams. This was no surprise to anyone familiar with Jerry Sloan. Williams seemed like the tougher guy, with a willingness to get others involved in a game. Sloan has always valued that over flashiness and scoring, which is what I'm sure he and the Jazz brass saw in Chris Paul. I have to admit I wanted them to draft Paul. The Jazz need a go-to guy and even though Boozer and Kirileko can score in double digits, I think they need someone else who will take the big shot when it's needed. Chris Paul seems like that type. Maybe I'm wrong and Deron Williams will end up being the better point guard in the long run and Paul will end up much like Stephon Marbury (talented, a scorer, but not a great player), but I have my doubts.

The Jazz have some questions that need to be answered in my mind for this year:

1. Can Kirilenko stay healthy and regain his 03-04 all-star form?

2. Can Boozer stay healthy and play like the guy the Jazz thought they shelled out all the cash for?

3. Can Deron Williams develop into a solid point guard this year and show all-star potential for the years to come?

4. Can Jerry Sloan relate to his players and actually adapt his style to fit the personnel he has?....Wait I know the answer to this already. As Napoleon Dynamite would say, "Idiot!"

5. Can Okur and Kirilenko avoid hair styles this year that leave grown men crying and mothers shielding their babies eyes?

I think the Jazz will be lucky if they come anywhere close to replicating their 03-04 season. I have hope for them but I'm also realistic that they may be a couple of years and a couple of players away from contending for a playoff spot. At any rate I'm still a fan and will stick with them no matter how painful it is. You can still get Tylenol over the counter right?

Monday Night Escape

The Steelers dodged a purple and black bullet last night. This was an ugly game (not surprising considering the teams involved) full of good defense and some pretty awful passes by both Quarterbacks. Say what you want about the Ravens offense but their defense always plays hard. And speaking of playing hard, how tough is Hines Ward? He plays like a man possessed.

Roethlisberger looked slow (ok, slower than normal) and his passes for the most part had little zip on them. Maybe those knees are going to be a problem.

I hate it when coaches get too conservative at the end of the game but I really didn't have too much of a problem with Cowher giving the ball to Bettis on 3rd and 3 down in Raven territory (a field goal only leaves you 1 point ahead)and still over a minute and a half to go. With Big Ben struggling a bit and knowing they were facing one of the worst offenses in the league, it's not the risk you think it would be to rely on your defense to hold them. However, if it was Indy or especially New England on the other sideline then that would be absolutely the wrong call. You need that first down and you know the defense will be stacking the box. In the playoffs if you leave the Colts or Patriots with a minute and a half to get a field goal at the end.....well, lets just say the fat lady not only will have sung for the Steelers but she will be talking to the "Bus" about ways they can shed a few pounds in the off-season together